Dreams of a Place the Eye has not Seen …

Lauren.Machu Pichu 6-29-12

I dream of a place …

Where gentle winds stir love and devotion and praise …
A place where the winds of strife and hate are no more
      A place where tornados and hurricanes are merely history

Where cool waters flow and quench all thirst …
      A place where seismic waves and tsunamis never happen
      A place where all people of the earth have Living Water

Where the Garden of Eden bursts forth in glorious splendor …
      A place where all is perfection
      A place where earthquakes are but a fading memory

Where doors are never locked …
      A place secure with nothing to fear
      A place that abounds in contentment and peace

Where illness and pain and death are no more …
      A place where the cancers of this world never tread
      A place where I can run and work and play and never tire

Where the honorable dwell in truth and purity …
      A place where people live in joy and laughter
      A place where grief and sorrow and tears don’t exist

Where the Tree of life sustains me …
      A place where the Tree yields its fruit every month
      A place where the leaves are for healing of the nations

Where sin has been abolished and joy lives …
      A place where everyone accepts the free gift of God
      A place where my name is written in the Book of Life

Where my eternal home is with Christ Jesus …
      A place prepared for me by the Creator of the world
      A place made especially for the sons and daughters of God

Where there’s a new day never before seen …
      A place where the old is made new
      A place where those without hope will become whole

Where heaven opens and a Rider on a white horse appears …
      A place whose rider is called Faithful and True
      A place where the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords reigns

Where all nations bow to King Jesus …
      A place where men no longer make war
      A place where the Lamb is honored and praised

Where I see God and the Lamb on the Throne …
      A place where I can talk with Them face to face
      A place where His name will be written on my forehead

Where the Bridegroom comes for me …
      A place of love and joy and happiness
      A place the eye has not seen and the mind cannot conceive

Where the Wedding Supper of the Lamb comes to pass …
      A place where those invited are blessed
      A place of celebration for the Bridegroom and His bride

Where the Lord is The Everlasting Light …
      A place where His Light will eclipse the sunrise and sunset
      A place where dark never reigns and God’s glory lights my way

Where God will dwell with His people and make everything new …
      A place called the Holy City, the New Jerusalem
      A place where God Himself will wipe away every tear

Where God and the Lamb rule for ever and ever and ever …
      The place where He will be my God and I will be His child
      The place of the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End
      The place of the Hallelujah!

I dream of a place …
      And I pray …
           Come quickly, Lord Jesus, Come

Inspired by comparison of Isaiah 60 and Revelation 21.
Picture credit: My granddaughter Lauren on a mountain at Machu Picchu, Peru.

 

Posted in General, God, Jesus Christ | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Birthdays … and Sunshine in January!

1945-Betty b irthday party 2

Birthdays — I’ve spent so many of these all alone!

Not because I wanted to, but because on January 31 the weather in Texas is usually freezing, snowing, sleeting, raining, or way too cold to stick your nose out-of-doors! And for about fifty years, I lived on a hill.

My mother used to tell the story of the day I was born. She expected me to arrive around the middle of March, but I evidently had other plans. My dad was working for Dallas Power & Light Company climbing poles and repairing electric lines during that time. He had been called out on an emergency job and she couldn’t reach him. Her best friend came over and together they boarded a bus, transferred to a streetcar, and got to the hospital in the middle of a snowstorm. DP&L got word to my dad and he managed to get to the hospital just before I was born.

I remember maybe five birthdays in my life when the sun was shining so I consider today a gift! The picture above was my tenth birthday. Mother always planned a party to celebrate the day, but this was one of the two birthdays we were able to spend outside. I look at this picture and remember so many fun times. My best friend to this day is on the far left middle row. Another close friend is on the far right middle row.

It was also special because I got to choose my birthday dress. And yes, it was black—I still like to wear black. Mother and I took the bus, transferred to a streetcar and went downtown Dallas to Neiman Marcus. Now, times were different back in the 1940s, money was scarce and we didn’t buy anything at Neiman’s. We walked around and looked then I showed mother the dresses I loved and she made a sketch of them. Next, we went to a department store where I choose fabric. This is what we did for my tenth birthday. Mother was an excellent seamstress and she made it just like the sketch. It was a black velveteen dress and I was thrilled. I thought I was so grown-up! Happy memories of a sunshiny day in January!

Another birthday stands out in my memory. My daughters and husband planned a huge surprise birthday party for my milestone birthday of 50 years! They invited over a hundred people, had chocolate cake and Asti Spumenti for all. It sleeted that day—the streets were solid ice. You know how it gets in Texas and I was scared to drive home from work. My husband drove to my office, had me follow him, and over the CB he talked me through icy streets to home!

Now remember, I lived midway up a hill and my driveway went up even higher, and it was all iced over. The party wasn’t exactly as planned! It was my daughters and several neighbors who made their way across the yards to my home. We had chocolate cake for supper and Asti Spumenti for years to come!

Usually when I’m frozen in and home alone on my birthday my mind wanders and I write all kinds of crazy stories. Some have been random thoughts about aging, musings about Universal Truths, and stories about “adult time out.” My mind just generally runs amuck! But those are stories are for another day and time when I get frozen in. Today the sun is shining and I see it as a very special birthday gift from God.

Through the multitude of years I’ve lived, I have come across a number of birthday quotes I love and since you’re reading this and I have your attention, I’m going to share my two of them:
“Age is a case of mind over matter,
                 If you don’t mind, it don’t matter!”
                                                                 — Satchel Page

           “Today you are you!
                That is truer than true!
                     There is no one alive who is you-er than you!”
                                                                                               –Dr. Seuss

And now I’m going out to dinner with my family and I just might order the most expensive entrée on the menu! So Happy Birthday to me and to everyone else who is celebrating today!

I have to close, my granddaughter is picking me up for dinner, but I can’t leave without giving you a thought to ponder …

          “How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?”
                                                                                                             — Satchel Page

Posted in Birthday, Dallas, General | Tagged , , , , | 4 Comments

“Twas the Night before Christmas at MacArthur Hills

MacHills at Christmas 2015My 2015 Christmas parody for all my friends at MacArthur Hills and for all helpers of Santa Claus everywhere!

‘Twas the night before Christmas, at MacHills, you know,
On the north side of Irving, without any snow,
The residents were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of the past danced in their heads.

The lights of Christmas glistened ‘round the hill,
Brightening the night and spreading good will.
No stockings were found at the foot of the bed
For this was Retirement, or so they said.

When all of a sudden, from out of the night
There came such a ruckus it gave us a fright.
We rushed to our porches and looked all around
To the north and the south and guess what we found.

When, what to our wondering eyes should appear,
But a Texas-sized pickup, V8, we could hear,
The driver in Levis, a shirt that was red,
A ten-gallon Stetson sat top of his head.

He jumped from the pickup; he was really a sight,
With his beard and moustache, so curly and white,
A right jolly old elf, he laughed greeting us,
His eyes, how they twinkled, Don’t make a fuss.

He spoke no more, but went straight to the back,
With a wink of his eye, he put wine in his sack
Just stopped to say Thanks, for a job well done,
You helped me give your children some fun.

He passed out the gifts, then turned with a jerk,
Children are waiting, I’m back to my work,
He leaped in his truck, and away it flew
The wine in our hands, our only clue.

So finally we know, Santa Claus is real,
Like Christmas, it’s what you feel.
We heard him shout, ere he drove out of sight,

HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ALL,

          AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!

https://searchquickknow-a.akamaihd.net/SearchQuickKnow/cr?t=BLFF&g=705e5ed4-2013-4872-ae9c-a56fefa62ae8

Posted in Christmas, General | Tagged , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Candlelight and Hot Milk … a different kind of Christmas.

Candle by BKG

 

 

Christmas—it’s all around us at this time of the year. We see it in the faces of little children, the music we hear, the movies we see, and in the hustle and bustle in the shopping centers of the city.

Nostalgia fills our eyes and ears and hearts until sometimes we have expectations of perfection that can’t be achieved, but we keep trying. We would all like the happy ending of the Hallmark Christmas movies that we enjoy when we finally have time to sit down and rest our weary feet.

However, reality is that perfect endings don’t often happen, at least not often enough to satisfy our hearts and souls. Sometimes our circumstances have changed or someone’s missing, sometimes families don’t get along and friction mars the day, but occasionally we have a glimpse of the happy ending in our lives.

Nostalgia has enveloped me this year. I moved last April from the home where I celebrated Christmas for almost fifty years, where so many memories were created, and I wonder where did it all go? Those precious moments in time, my daughters running to see what Santa Claus brought them, the glow of the fireplace in the evenings, the soft strumming of the guitar as my daughters’ dad sang Scarlet Ribbons to them, and the special smiles that passed between my husband and me. It was only yesterday—where did all the time go?

My new home is rather like a blank canvas, just waiting to be painted on. There have been a few strokes on it this past year, such as eating Blue Bell ice cream in my new home before I moved in, my daughters and I making desserts for my grandson’s wedding reception, and a dinner with all the family crowded around the table. But the fifty years of memories—they are still with me. It’s a different kind of Christmas this year.

I struggle in the dark nights when my mind is bombarded with my past lives. Yes, more than one, two lives gone before they were finished. Christmas seems to call forth promises that life set before us in our youth, the excitement of a journey not yet lived, the pleasures of sharing a life with our love, and the “happy ever after” dream of growing old together. All so very real when we are young and life is blossoming before us. Through the years those precious moments-in-time turn into memories. We delve into life and the future seems so far away when all of a sudden it is over, and it’s not exactly like we dreamed it would be.

So in the middle of the night when sleep becomes impossible and the memories are very real, I flip on the light, make my way to the kitchen, and heat milk for my special drink, hot vanilla milk my mother made for me as a child. I light a candle and curl up in my favorite club chair with my red blanket wrapped around me, sip my drink, and watch the flickering candle.

Years ago a friend talked about how she lights a candle each morning and when she glances at it, she is reminded that the Lord is the Light of the world and He is with her. This comforts me and I don’t feel quite so alone. Maybe this is where we are supposed to go during the season of our Lord Jesus’ birth. Maybe the middle of the night is the only time we are still enough for the Lord to get our attention. Perhaps the wakeful nights are actually the Lord reminding us what Christmas is really about. It’s about Jesus bringing hope into a dark world, a light in the middle of the night.

Will I always struggle? I don’t know, my lost loves are forever with me and I miss them, but the flicker of candlelight in a darkened room makes a difference. I remember that Hope has come. Hope designates a future and so I look forward to what tomorrow brings—new friends, new experiences, and new memories, all made sweeter because of the lessons that yesterday taught me.

So, my friends, when the darkness overwhelms, get up and make hot vanilla milk or hot chocolate, light a candle, and know that someone nearby may be doing the same. Look at the flickering light and be comforted by the presence of Jesus who promises He will never leave us and He will always be with us, and even more—He is preparing a new and perfect ending for us.

          Christmas has come and Hope is here …
               So light the candle …
                    Darkness flees in the presence of Light.
                               Hallelujah!

                        MERRY CHRISTMAS

 
Hot Vanilla Milk
1 cup of hot milk
1 teaspoon of sugar
3-4 drops of vanilla flavoring
And enjoy!
Posted in Christmas, General, God, Jesus Christ, Memories, Moving | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

December 7, 1941, a date which lives in infamy … and tears flowed all over America

600px-Burning_ships_at_Pearl_Harbor

 

 

 

Pearl Harbor — President Franklin D. Roosevelt proclaimed December 7, 1941, “A date which will live in infamy.”

It has been 74 years since that vicious attack. It was one of those times in our lives where the memories are embedded forever. I remember exactly where I was—it was a Sunday afternoon and I was playing jacks with my best friend on her front porch. Her dad came out and said “Girls, I need to talk to you, come on in the house.” He started by telling us that we were all right and we were safe. Then he told us about the attack on Pearl Harbor and that America was officially at war. He didn’t scare us, but he did explain what it meant for our country to be at war.

Our country was stronger back then and the only attack on American soil was Pearl Harbor. It is significant to remember that this happened just as our nation was coming out of the great depression. Everybody’s lives changed drastically at that time. Bomb shelters were built around our city; we had bomb drills in our homes, schools, and in workplaces. Life was no longer predictable or normal. Many of my friends’ fathers and brothers joined the war, and, as time passed we began to see blue stars in the windows of houses as we walked to and from school. We knew that meant someone’s husband, father, son, or brother was fighting in the war. A silver star stood for a wounded soldier. If we saw a gold star, we knew someone had been killed. At that time America was so strongly based in God that the tears were cleansing, and we were united in our efforts to keep America free. When the World War II ended, there was a time of great rejoicing and celebration and rebuilding of lives.

It is said that people and nations are defined by their past. As I look at where our nation is today, the tears flow again, and I wonder if we will every see the peace that lived so briefly in the 1950s. The Korean War reared its ugly head during that time period and went almost unnoticed except by those gallant warriors who were fighting it.

In 1962, a Supreme Court ruling separated Christian principles from education and government and said, “No prayer in schools.” This was followed in 1963 by the removal of the Bible from our schools.

November 1963, John F. Kennedy was shot and Camelot ended. That was the day people began to realize that America’s innocence had been lost. Our country spiraled rapidly down at that point, and it became a “Get it while you can” world. Materialism whirled upward and we saw the birth of the “Me generation.”

In 1965, America officially entered the Vietnam War and our nation deserted its warriors. We failed our soldiers, but they didn’t fail us. They fought valiantly against an enemy that included men, women and children, and then they came home to criticism. It is a war that still hangs over America’s head as a dark cloud. And my tears flowed.

Next came the great search for significance, for who am I, for where is my place in the world, for “righteous” causes, all in an effort to fill the gaping hole in people’s hearts for where God should be. They tried to fill this void by seeking gratification in selfish pleasures, unwholesome activities, sexual freedoms and perversions, tolerance of ungodly things, and lifestyle freedoms, and the great teacher became television. In the following years, television promoted the “I’m worth it” theory and America grabbed on with both hands.

The Supreme Court continued its assault on America’s founding beliefs in 1977 with the recognition of atheism as a religion. The Ten Commandments were removed from the schools in 1980, followed by another Supreme Court Ruling in 1986 that secular humanism was a religion. The gaping hole in America’s soul grew larger.

America’s problems grew. Materialism continued to climb upward. Instead of needing clothes, youth now needed name brands to make them feel worthwhile. Only the best of everything would suffice. Television taught that not only “You are worth it, but you deserve it.” Drugs increased despite all the “Just say NO” campaigns. Violence was no longer just on television, but also on the streets. Sexual freedoms of all sorts became commonplace and accepted; sex and nudity became explicit on television. Television became the great babysitter and the content was not monitored. We became a nation so tolerant that many felt it was wrong to object to anything, now known as political correctness.

On September 11, 2001, my tears flowed again. America was invaded, this time on our own soil and people were brought to their knees in prayer. I was in Montana near Glacier National Park and this day will be forever etched in my mind. My home-bound trip was astounding. As I drove through the states of Montana, Idaho, Washington, Oregon, California, Nevada, Arizona, New Mexico, and into Texas, I saw American flags displayed everywhere from homes, buildings, cars, and even inside restaurants. People were once again open, friendly, concerned with a common cause. God was now on the lips and minds of countless Americans. But sadly, it didn’t last—America forgot its values again.

Today, we face a war on American soil, with an indeterminate enemy who is much like Satan. We can’t see him, we can’t find his dwelling place, we don’t know where he will attack next, and we don’t know exactly how much power he has.

This is a war for the soul of America and it will be fought on our knees and in our hearts and with our tears. It’s time for each of us to take a hard look at our lives and root out the things we know are wrong, and to take a repentant look at our souls. It’s time for each of us to realize that God is in charge, that He is fully and completely capable and deserving of our reverent praise, obedience, and loyalty; and that our ultimate safety lies only in Him. Then we need to get on our knees in a firm commitment to pray daily for our saddened nation, for the people of our country, and for God’s will to be done in each of us.

Only then can America be what God wants us to be. Only through God can we be conquerors. Only then can we fill the gaping hole in America’s soul.

Oh, yes, I remember Pearl Harbor
                        And the tears still flow …

 

 

Picture credit: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3ABurning_ships_at_Pearl_Harbor.jpg
Posted in America, General, God | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

People Who Need People

Oktoberfest accordian 3People
People who need people
Are the luckiest people in the world
We’re children, needing other children
And yet letting a grown up pride
Hide all the need inside
Acting more like children than children.

Do you remember this song?
Barbra Streisand sang it in the movie Funny Girl in 1964.

I heard a comment on television yesterday that triggered the memory. Betty White said “When you get old, you’re going to want company, but not a company.” And it smoldered around in this crazy brain of mine. It’s usually January and February when I go on writing tangents, but I suppose it’s the rainy weather we’re having.

I thought of all the many ways we spend our lives, working, running a company, struggling for the next job that will bring home more income for our families, raising our children, cleaning our homes, cooking meals, and so forth. And then there’s the holidays with all the decorations and preparations, all of which are important and, for the most part, we enjoyed the journey except for the aching feet and back that usually accompanied all that effort to make it perfect for our families.

Then life makes an abrupt turn, we get older, illness rears its ugly head, a loved one dies, or we have to move to make our life easier. We discover that all these things we used to do are not quite as important as they were. The traumas of life have taken a toll on us.

For some of us, life becomes solitary at that point. We see friends, play Bridge, Canasta, dominoes or golf, enjoy a hobby or two, meet for lunches or an occasional dinner out, and participate in church activities, but somehow the evenings hang heavy and lonely and silent. We leave our homes and return with no one waiting or even noticing that we’ve been away. We miss the sweet companionship of talking about the day, the program on the television, and laughing at silly stories. Somehow, the holiday decorations and preparations lose some of the excitement they used to bring to our hearts.

This is what Betty White’s comment triggered—it’s people we need as we get older, it’s sharing life on a day-to-day basis with someone. That’s what I have found at my new home in MacArthur Hills, friends to do life with. Yes, we live in individual villas or apartments, but we’re not nearly as alone as when we were isolated in a large empty house that once had been filled with love and laughter.

I can walk out on my front porch and see a friend across the way and they smile and wave and the loneliness lessens. And I love the front porches, but that’s another story for another day. I can leave in my car and wave at neighbors and someone actually knows I’ve gone someplace. And when I miss dinner, someone says “We missed you last night.” It’s the little things in life that bring cheer to our hearts!

It’s a different lifestyle, but for me change has been a way of life. (I know I’ve mentioned this before, but it just seems worth repeating.) I tend to call the big, the major changes, chapters of my life. I figure I’m now in Chapter Seven! Now seven rings a bell in my nit-picky brain …  seven symbolizes completeness or wholeness and perfection. For example, God created the world in six days and declared it good. By the seventh day He had finished the work He had been doing; and on the seventh day He rested from all his work. God blessed the seventh day and made it holy. Hmm m, resting sounds pretty good right now—and I definitely like the sound of entering a blessed time!

As a writer, I’ve always thought it would be incredible to go to one of the many “Writing Retreats” I’ve seen advertised across the United States, to be able to bury myself in writing, and not cooking and cleaning. And this is what I’ve discovered I now have—my very own special retreat, where I can become truly immersed in writing and not have to worry about food! There’s dinner and friends waiting at the end of the day—

Even though the lifestyle we were used to has changed, or the person who filled our heart, soul, and life is gone, or we’ve retired from a job we valued, we still have the need for people. I am blessed to have found a community of friends living close together, who can share dinners in the evening, talk about the events of the day, and laugh a little—or a lot!

So here’s a thank you to new friends for the sweet welcome …
And hugs to my old friends for their love and support …
And to the many helpers who make this possible …
Here’s to friendship and the pleasures of a special life on which we have embarked …
May our days be cheery and the evening meal filled with conversation, fun and laughter …

May each of you find joy in living, fun in celebrations we didn’t have to plan but are invited to enjoy, such as the Italian Dinner with candles and Chianti, the Pajama Party serving breakfast for dinner, Friday afternoons Happy Hour with wine or cokes and conversation, and Oktoberfest with brats and beer and pretzels and Little Brown Jug on the accordion!

And, dear friends, I suspect more fun times are coming!
After all, Halloween is next week!
Costumes…Hmm m? Why not!

 

Posted in Changes, General, MacArthur Hills, senior community | Tagged , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

A “Great Depression” Wedding …

1932 Mother & dad

The Great Depression, Marietta, Oklahoma, a big city, and a red dress — what do they have in common? Nothing at all, except it was when and where my mother and dad got married.

On August 26, 1932, eighty-three years ago, my parents Alice Bernice Davenport and Homer Edward Hayes were married in the middle of the Great Depression.

Here’s what was happening then  —
The Great Depression lasted from 1929 until 1941.
1929: The stock market crashed.
1930: Severe drought and dust bowl conditions lasted until 1935.
1931: Food riots broke out.
1932: Stocks reached their lowest level.
In November Franklin D. Roosevelt was elected President.
1933: More than 11,000 of the nation’s 25,000 banks had closed.
Unemployment reached its highest level.
1935: The Works Projects Administration (WPA) was formed to employ
8.5 million people on public works projects across the country.
The Social Security Act was signed into law.
1936: FDR was elected to a second term as president.
1938: FDR asked Congress for $3.75 billion to stimulate the
still floundering economy.
1940: FDR was elected to a third term as president.
1941: World War II began and the Great Depression ended.
1940: FDR was elected to a third term as president.
1941: World War II began and the Great Depression ended.

Times were hard in 1932 — and weddings as we know them today were practically non-existent in the dust bowl economy of Texas.

During the recent move to my new home, my daughters and I were sifting through boxes of stored memorabilia and we found a treasure! Mother's wedding notebookIt was a small notebook telling the story of my parents’ wedding, and I want to share that story amidst the fancy and incredible weddings that happen today. So in my mother’s words:

“Homer and I decided on Sunday, August 21 to get married Friday August 26. After church on Wednesday night we told mama. Thursday Homer, mama, and I went to Dallas. Homer gave me my diamond. I went to church Thursday night.

We left home about 10 o’clock Friday morning, Johnnie, Homer and I. Mrs. Sims was home with mama. We stopped by Markaletas and we got to Denton about 11 where we met Lorraine and J.T. Then we started for Marietta. We stopped and ate dinner in Gainesville. After cleaning up a bit, we were on our way again. Johnnie did most of the driving.

At 25 minutes after 2 o’clock, I became Mrs. Hayes. … We were married in the courthouse in Marietta, Oklahoma by Rev. Stewart, a Methodist preacher.

We went back to Gainesville where Lorraine, J.T. and Johnnie got in J.T.’s car and went home. Homer and I got a room at the Turner Hotel in Gainesville and spent out first night together. We were up and to breakfast by 6 the next morning. Neither of us had slept a wink. We then rented a cabin in a tourist camp and stayed until about 10 o’clock Sunday. We got home about 12.

… Thursday Homer and I went to Dallas and bought our furniture – all but the stove. We went to Denton Saturday and bought it on September 2. We stayed all night in our new home on Friday night September 2 for the first time. Homer cleaned and fixed the bedroom while I worked at telephone office.

Mama brought us 30 announcements and we mailed them … Ruth Witt gave us a shower party on Wednesday September 7.”

Mother and dad’s new home near Little Elm was a two-room apartment above a garage where the local mechanic worked on cars. In the little notebook, mother also tells the story of how a group of their friends “abducted” her from their new home, poured food coloring on her then hid her in a ditch from my dad. This was known as a shiveree—by definition, a mock serenade with kettles, pans, horns, and other noisemakers given for a newly married couple; an informal elaborate, noisy celebration. Evidently a popular occurrence in the 1930s but can you believe food coloring …!

1935 Mother-daddy-BettySo here’s to my parents who were married for 55 years before dad died in 1987. Here’s to the two young people who fell in love and were brave enough to marry during those rugged years, and who always remembered them with a smile on their face. Here’s to the picnics at Lake Dallas and sitting in the front yard after dinner on hot summer nights. Here’s to the stories they told me, and to the simpler life and times they lived in. And most of all — to the love, commitment, and values they shared and modeled in front of me all my life.

And yes – my mother wore a red dress at their wedding.

Happy Anniversary, Mom and Dad!!

Posted in America, Dallas, General, Great Depression, marriage, Memories, Time Capsule, Wedding | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Changes … Chapter 7 in the Seasons of Life

Owl-2

 

I don’t much like changes…
How about you?
This year I moved from my home of almost fifty years, the place where my daughters grew up and where I lived for most of my life. Sifting thru the things that I found in boxes, closets, cabinets, attic, and the garage awakened memories that had been stored away in the deep recesses of my mind. And I’ve lived them again, the good and the bad.  

Change—it’s been a way of life for me. I tend to call the big, the major changes, chapters of my life. I figure I’m now in Chapter Seven! Now seven rings a bell in my nit-picky brain … in the Bible seven symbolizes completeness or wholeness and perfection. For example, God created the world in six days and declared it good. By the seventh day God had finished the work He had been doing; and on the seventh day He rested from all his work. God blessed the seventh day and made it holy. Hmm m, resting sounds pretty good right now—and I definitely like the sound of entering a blessed time!

Okay, I know, I’ve gone down a rabbit trail, so back to the subject of changes. Some were welcomed with open arms, such as graduation from high school and moving to a college dormitory. At seventeen years old the world was exciting and new, life was beautiful. On second thought … maybe I do like changes! Well, good changes anyway, these are indeed welcomed.

However, and there’s always a however, isn’t there? It’s the unexpected ones—the sudden loss of a job or a move across the country and leaving a home you’ve dearly loved. Then there’s the life-altering one, the death of a loved one. It shakes our souls, and we’re left trembling and disoriented. These changes force us to look at who we are, where we’ve been, and where we’re going.

There are the planned changes we know we have to make, such as what I’ve done this year. I’ve “left home” again. Moving into a smaller space meant leaving behind many bits and pieces of my life, insignificant things that had no meaning to anyone but me, little treasures that evoked memories of a life that is now buried in the past.

I’ve come to realize that these little things are sometimes soul-searing. One was a picture of an owl my daughters drew when they were very young. It somehow got lost during the confusion of the move and the longer I searched for it, the more important it became to me. I eventually found it tossed halfway under the deck in the backyard where we’d been shifting boxes in and out of the garage. The owl is drawn on an old piece of board with a chain attached to hang it with—which I certainly did for a long time. The memories and tears come when you turn it over and find their childish signatures and the words “To the best parents in the world.” I can still picture their excited faces as I opened the gift they had so carefully wrapped in tissue paper with what must have been a whole roll of tape. Absolutely no way could I leave this behind. It’s hanging in the garage of my new home and I smile at it every time I go to my car.

Memories, they’re important, they are the way we touch our past. The past is what makes us who we are. Memories—they are never finished.

Playing with blocks 3As this move ripped through my life, new memories and new scenes have formed in my heart. One Saturday as my daughters and I were working to clear out their childhood home, and shedding a few tears along the way, we found a set of puzzle blocks in a box. Each side made a picture—there are six puzzles as blocks are six-sided. The trick was to get the correct sides face up and then complete the puzzle. We took a much-needed time-out to see if they could still work the puzzles! My great-grandson that was sitting in my daughter’s lap eventually got down and started helping. New memories, sweet memories.

There’s no way around it, change is just plain difficult even when we plan it. I think I may have gone into a fugue state the past few months, much like grief—nothing seemed real at first then the ramifications set in, I was really leaving my home behind. Ever so slowly a new normal has begun to take place along with a renewed interest in where life will go from here! And a deep thankfulness to my daughters, granddaughters, and grandson who cared enough to give up weekends for several months to move me, who worked until exhaustion set in, and continued to love me—thank you, my beloved family.

Throughout this long, arduous move, I have been reminded of a story about a missionary couple who had been working in Africa for many years. They were returning to New York City to retire with no pension and fearful of the future. As luck would have it, they were on the same ship as Teddy Roosevelt, who was returning from a big-game expedition, and they watched the passengers and crew fussing over him.

When they arrived in New York a band was waiting to greet the President and the missionary couple slipped off the boat unseen and unwelcome. They found a cheap apartment and that night as they settled in, the man’s spirit broke. Dejected, he told his wife, “I can’t take this. God is not treating us fairly.”

His wife could only answer that maybe he should tell the Lord how he was feeling. Later when he came back in the room his attitude had completely changed. “What happened,” his wife asked.

“The Lord settled it with me,” he answered. “I told Him how bitter I was that there was no one to welcome us home and how hard it was to watch the tremendous homecoming the President got. As I finished my tirade and rose to my feet, it felt like a hand touched my shoulder and I heard the words … ‘but you’re not home yet.’”

And I’m not home yet either …
      So here’s to Chapter 7,
         To my family,
            To old and new friends,
                To old and new memories,
                    To old and new times,
                        To the blessing of Hope that is forever new.
The best is yet to be!

Posted in Changes, General, Memories, Moving | Tagged , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Father’s Day … someone to watch over me

1946 Daddy and me--Grand Canyon

I’m thinking about my dad …
     and I’m reminded of an old song,
          “Someone to Watch over Me.”

Dad was the one who made me feel safe, protected, and loved. I thought nothing could ever go wrong as long as he was there. If it did, I had complete faith that he could take care of it. As far as I was concerned, he could take care of anything. In my eyes, he was all-powerful.

Because dad disagreed with many of the man-imposed beliefs of the church he grew up in, he wouldn’t go to a formal church, however, I never heard him criticize it or his parents. As I grew up, I began to see that while he didn’t go to church, he was a believer in Christ. He didn’t talk the talk—he simply lived what he believed.

I watched dad’s attitude and manner with my grandparents. I saw the way he honored them. He never raised his voice or spoke to them without a sir or ma’am—can you tell he grew up in Texas! I don’t remember dad using foul language, yelling, or telling dirty jokes in front of the family. I wasn’t “taught” to be respectful of my parents and grandparents—it was modeled in front of me.

Dad was very strict and his rules were not to be broken. I can still hear his voice going very soft when I did something I shouldn’t, and I knew I was in trouble. I was taught to never ask why or beg him to change his mind. I was actually in my forties before I learned where the “never ask why” came from. Matthew 5:37 says “Simply let your ‘yes’ be ‘yes’, and your ‘no,’ be ‘no.’ Anything beyond this comes from the evil one.”

The value of controlling my tongue was brought home to me very early in my life. You’ll notice that I said the value of controlling my tongue. I’m still working on the control part; it’s been a lifelong challenge. I have clamped my teeth over my tongue many, many times, and wished I had many other times. At dad’s constant prompting to think before you speak, I learned the importance of thinking things out. Most of the time when I did stop and think, I didn’t need to say it or ask about it. Usually just slowing down kept me out of trouble.

I don’t remember dad ever telling me he loved me in words; but there was never a time in my life when I doubted his love. I knew it, just like I knew that morning always follows the night. One of the most important things I realized very early in life was that I was the child and dad was the adult. He was the authority over me and always would be. And I felt safe and protected.

Don’t get the wrong idea, dad wasn’t perfect, he had flaws like everybody else, but he walked the walk. And this laid the groundwork for my acceptance of Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. Dad made it easy for me to accept the authority of God the Father.

No matter what our earthly fathers are like, good, bad, or indifferent, we all have a heavenly Father who created us and knew us before we were ever born (Psalm 139), one who knows the number of our days, who wants the best for us, who promises to take care of us, and who through belief in His Son Jesus Christ has made us heirs of His eternal kingdom along with His Son.

Dad went home to God the Father’s eternal kingdom a long time ago, and when I am missing him, I open God’s Word and read His promises …

And I know without a doubt that
           Someone is still watching over me …

 

Posted in Father's Day, General, God, Jesus Christ | Tagged , , , | 5 Comments

Memorial Day … a day to remember

Eagle-Gary Morris

There are 46,551 brush strokes in the painting, each stroke represents one American soldier that did not come home from Vietnam.

Painted by Gary Morris, Lt Col USMC.       Vietnam Vet

Memories cloud my mind today of the men in my family who served in the armed forces. We were one of the fortunate families, they all came home. Others weren’t so blessed. Walking home from school during World War II, I watched the windows of the homes I passed. My heart sank each time I saw a gold star had replaced a blue one; that meant the serviceman from that home had been killed. Life changed in the moment someone opened the door and looked in the face of the person delivering that dreaded telegram. And I remember…

I watched the newsreels at the movie theater and will never forget the horrors of face-to-face combat. Etched in my mind is the day the atomic bomb dropped on Hiroshima and the pictures that came back to the United States showing people whose skin was literally falling off their faces. And I remember…

My grandfather, Eldon Lowrey, was a foot soldier in France during World War I. He told stories about marching behind the men on horseback till he thought his legs would drop off. He said they had to keep up with the horses. He was especially fond of telling about the time a Frenchman stopped his wagon and invited some of them to hop on and ride a while. He developed a love of champagne while he was in France. His doctor became his dearest friend when he prescribed one glass of wine every evening. About once a month, he would ask us to get him one bottle of champagne for medicinal purposes. He kept it in the garage because my grandmother didn’t approve of any alcoholic beverages and would not have it in the house. We tried to convince him that it went flat after opened and that some of the other wines would hold better, however, nothing would do but champagne, no matter how flat! He was a special man, my grandfather. And I remember…

My first husband, Bill Kerss, served in the Korean War, but never saw combat. As a G-2 agent stationed at the News Center in Kansas City, his top-secret status didn’t allow him to share with me what he did or where he went on when he was away. During the 1950s nothing could be released to the newspapers, radio, or television until it had official clearance from the military. Security was tightly controlled. His service here in the states didn’t feel much different from having a regular job—except for wearing the Army uniform and when he was away on missions. We enjoyed our time in Missouri, but were glad to get back to Texas. My childhood sweetheart, friend, lover, and father of my daughters died in 1977. And I remember…

I’m thinking, too, about my brother-in-law, Ernest Lueck, who was wounded in Korea, but always felt lucky that he got to come home. Many didn’t. I remember one of the Christmases he was there when the family packed a metal trash can filled with presents for him. It was full of warm clothing, food and treats. This happy, laughing man lived until 2010. And I remember…

Today, thoughts of my second husband, Ray Groezinger, are particularly intense. The stories he used to tell me are flooding my mind. He was not quite eighteen when World War II started in the 1930s. America was not yet in it. He tried to go to Canada with some of his buddies to enlist in the Canadian Armed Forces, but his mother would not sign the papers for him. As soon as he became of age, he and a couple of his friends signed up, America was now in the war. They were sent to Pensacola, Florida for flight training. It was very different in those early years, they signed up with the stipulation they could resign at will. Try that one today! They were trained to fly open cockpit planes. These three friends formed a life-long love of flying.

The right to resign sounds impossible today, but that is exactly what they did. They wanted to get into the action, to be in actual combat. Leaving Pensacola behind, they went to Twenty-nine Palms, Arizona, where they enlisted a second time and signed on as officers and flight instructors. Once again their attempt to see action was foiled, and they were held in Arizona. There were very few instructors, and this was where they were needed. I have to mention that Ray wore the uniforms of the Army, the Air Force, and the Navy! These three guys could sit for hours telling and retelling the stories of that time, however, they never got over their regrets about having to stay stateside. After the war was declared over, Ray and his friends were sent to Denison, Texas, where they checked out returning pilots who had been prisoners of war. Some of the returnees were able to pass the tests and recertify as pilots, others could not. My dear Ray, friend, traveling companion, and loving husband died in 2011. And I remember…

I usually share Memorial Day with my cousin, Gary Morris, a Marine and veteran of Vietnam. We have dinner together and watch television. We don’t talk much about war; however it’s on both our minds. We talk mostly about baseball and the Texas Rangers. He carries many scars, both visible and invisible. He went to Vietnam a happy, laughing young man and came home with a sadness and pain that has never left him, scars of the mind. The two of us are the oldest in our families, the last holdouts of our generation, it is a bittersweet day as he remembers those who did not return home.  And we remember…

It’s important to remember on Memorial Day not only those who died, but the ones who returned home. Most of them carry scars, some visible, others invisible, and some never heal. From the time our nation was formed, from World War I to the wars of today in Desert Storm, Iraq, and Afghanistan, it’s important to remember why men go to war, it is for the right of all men to live free. It’s important to recognize this today and honor that sacrifice, to say thank you to these brave warriors who served so you and I can live in a free country.

It’s important to pay attention to what is going on in our country today and to stand up to those who want to change America to be like other countries of the world where people are not free. It’s important to know the principles on which our country was founded, not just to know them, but to oppose those who want to change them.

It’s important to realize that political rhetoric is just “campaign talk,” not necessarily what the person believes or intends to do, but is only said to get elected. What politicians promise and actually do are two entirely different things, and they don’t often coincide. How sad this loss of integrity is. Look to the years behind them, what they have supported and not supported, their values and morals, their business ability, do your homework and ignore the emotional rhetoric.

It’s important to realize that all the freedoms we take for granted are slowly being eroded in the miasma of political correctness and politicians who are only there to feed their own egos.

It’s important to enforce the laws of America. They are there for a reason, not to harm, but to protect and preserve the freedoms of American citizens. It’s important to welcome all who come into our country legally and stop supporting those who come illegally.

Study and learn about the price your ancestors paid for the freedom America has enjoyed. Learn about the founding fathers of our country, what they believed, and the reasons they came and settled this country. The cost was great. Then pay attention to the world today, to the erosion of the morals and values that all these valiant men and women fought for and are still fighting for.

The gauntlet has been thrown down. The freedoms of the American people are slowly being taken away. Look to history, it repeats itself. Big government is eroding the free enterprise system. It is stifling the public schools. It is strangling the doctors in a morass of rules and regulations. And this is the tip of the iceberg. I challenge you to pay attention to what is happening in our country; to look at the socialistic direction our country is going, to be knowledgeable, and then to get involved. Remember — a government big enough to give you anything you want is big enough to take everything you have.

Don’t let the hard-fought-for and cherished freedoms of America disappear … the American way of life has been unique in this world. I challenge you, my dear ones, to preserve the heritage your ancestors fought and died for.

Oh, yes, memories cloud my mind today of the valiant men in my life, but also of a time when the world was more innocent, when a man’s word had meaning, when men could run their business the way they wanted to, when children could walk home from school alone safely, and of a time when no one had to lock doors …

And I remember …

Posted in America, General, Memorial Day, Veterans, Vietnam | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments