Chasing the Wind … Seeking solace for my soul





The past week has been rather like chasing the wind, it’s been an emotional journey. Myriads of memories, events from the past have flooded my mind. My brain seems to work in strange ways, sometimes thoughts come that are not connected to the incident that triggered them. Past memories seemed to call forth others.

I was wrestling with the winds of injustice, injustice to two little children who never grew up, never finished elementary school, never went to high school, never had a first date, and never received a bouquet of flowers. Drama plays a major part in all our lives, perhaps you remember the painting of comedy and tragedy that represents the times of joy and times of grief. Through the decades of my life I’ve wondered and questioned why some lives are filed with those sad grief-encompassed times while other people skirt around the edges experiencing very little trauma and loss.

It’s for your own good, there’s a reason, you’ll get over it, God will use it for good, and time cures all are some of the many comments I’ve heard through the years. Many, many more have been said by the people who seem to swim gently through life. All are said sincerely and with love by dear people who want to help, but there are just some places deep within us that can’t be consoled. Sometimes the best way to help a person in grief is just to sit quietly, and perhaps remember a good time.

Eventually the rawness of grief settles and becomes a scar on our soul until a circumstance awakens it, and, once again, we have to deal with the traumatic event. After so many years of traveling through this imperfect world, I’ve learned that there are no real answers, that there is really nothing anyone can say to ease the pain of a lost one, that we just have to go through it with God’s help and as much grace as we can find within us, that time will smooth out the rough edges, and allow us to go forward. But the getting there is hard, oh, so hard; it’s where the rubber meets the road.

I will never understand why little children and young people in the prime of their life are taken from us. I will never agree with death. I will never understand why our political system does not always punish the evil and wicked people who destroy life. Ultimately, we have little control of most events that go on around us. And ultimately, we have to make the decision to let go and let the Lord who made the heavens and the earth take care of what we cannot.

What I had to remember again this past week was that Almighty God loved man so much that He gave man free will, the power to choose between right and wrong, evil and good, and that some people choose to go the way of evil. I had to remember that God does not violate the free will He gave to man.

Bottom line is God does not approve of death either. That’s why he sent His Son Jesus Christ to live on earth as a man and to experience everything we as human beings experience, and then to die for each of us. He paid the penalty for our sins when He suffered and died on the cross two thousand years ago. All because He loved us and did not approve of death either.

It seems that the older I get the less I know, but what I do know is that Almighty God, the same God who created the world and formed man from the ground, says He will in His timing make all things right. He says every man will be judged for what he does and says on this earth, and that vengeance belongs to Him. So one more time, I have to leave it with Almighty God and adjust my life accordingly.

The incredible part is that Jesus rose again from the grave after three days, then walked and talked with all the disciples. The grave could not hold Him! Hallelujah! He rose from that grave and Almighty God says that if you believe in His Son Jesus, you will live and see your loved ones again.

So my dear ones, here is my peace and comfort, here is the solace for my soul; I have made the choice to believe in Jesus Christ and I believe I will see my loved ones again. No, I haven’t figured out why some of us have so much loss and others have so little, but I have to let it go—it is only chasing the wind.

So what does matter in this life? For me, it’s God’s promise of eternal life for all who believe in His Son Jesus Christ. It’s the promise of a new home and eternal future with my loved ones.

BUT, it’s also the people who are in our lives today. It matters that we love and cherish those that are still here.

It matters to me.

What matters to you?





About Betty Kerss Groezinger

Betty Kerss Groezinger, a native Texan, was born in Dallas. She was a legal researcher for President Harry S. Truman in Independence, Missouri, taught business courses at Rockhurst College in Kansas City, Missouri, and on her return to Dallas, she worked for more than a decade with advertising agencies. She has been a resident of Irving, Texas, since 1965, and is now working on the sequel to The Davenport Dilemma.
This entry was posted in General, Jesus Christ, Memories and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Chasing the Wind … Seeking solace for my soul

  1. Judy Gafford says:

    Beautifully written and oh so poignant. I also do not understand so many things. Why we make the choices we make…knowing they will destroy lives. Other lives and our own. I just know that we serve a God who understands our deepest griefs and pain and that He is in control of the ending. Thanks for sharing your heart, my friend.


  2. leska valerius says:

    Thanks, Betty!

    On Mon, Apr 4, 2016 at 11:10 AM, Betty Kerss Groezinger wrote:

    > Betty Kerss Groezinger posted: ” The past week has been rather like > chasing the wind, it’s been an emotional journey. Myriads of memories, > events from the past have flooded my mind. My brain seems to work in > strange ways, sometimes thoughts come that are” >


  3. says:

    Wow, I wish I could put my feelings and thoughts into words like that. It’s beautiful! And it’s also true! Wendy


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